Vancouver Canucks hire coach John Tortorella

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Topper
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Topper »

A couple of posters have obligations to live up to
Rumsfeld wrote:Everyone just dry off.

Torts will not be our coach. If that goofy little hamsterfaced smugfuck is our coach this season I will personally drive CFP to the ferry.
enjoy the ride CFP
Eddy Punch Clock wrote:
RoyalDude wrote:I got a sneaking suspicion the Players Agent is gonna hire Torts.
If he does I will join you on the dark side.

From that day forward I will also refer to him as the Players Agent..... and any past questionable moves he's made that I'm currently giving him the benefit of the doubt on will now forever be filed under FAIL.

Also, if Gillis hires Torts, I will eat my own pubes like that Flames fan..... even given what HW has said.
I've always eaten them from a juicy pie, but they were never my own, so I can't help you with any recipes.
Over the Internet, you can pretend to be anyone or anything.

I'm amazed that so many people choose to be complete twats.
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Eddy Punch Clock »

Topper wrote:I've always eaten them from a juicy pie, but they were never my own, so I can't help you with any recipes.
I prefer meat pies too. Not much of a sweet tooth.

Think I'll make a crab salad.
2011..... the one that got away.
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by ODB »

Strangelove wrote:
My name is Strangelove and I love this hiring. :thumbs:
I totally agree Doc. As I said in the canned thread, we've been begging for bold. This is bold! Tort's in this market, it's going to be interesting. But GMMG didn't take the safe road here. He's put his neck on the line and brought in a guy that's going to demand the player’s attention.

I don't think he'll coach here as long as AV did but I also don't see this team getting swept in the first round next spring.

Hey Hey, Ho Ho, Av has got to go...

Ding Dong the stupid cunt is dead... :D

Long Live Torts... :drink:
BTW, NOT A FLAME ... JUST AN OBSERVATION ... :P
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Rumsfeld »

Oh well, what's the worst that could happen.

*accelerates while shoving CFP's booster seat out of truck*
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Strangelove »

ODB wrote: Hey Hey, Ho Ho, Av has got to go...

Ding Dong the stupid cunt is dead... :D

Long Live Torts... :drink:
Yeah, you and I were both hollering for AV's head a year ago. :cheers:

The only thing that worries me about Torts is that he sometimes sports a goatee.... :look:
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Rumsfeld »

Strangelove wrote:
ODB wrote: Hey Hey, Ho Ho, Av has got to go...

Ding Dong the stupid cunt is dead... :D

Long Live Torts... :drink:
Yeah, you and I were both hollering for AV's head a year ago. :cheers:


The only thing that worries me about Torts is that he sometimes sports a goatee.... :look:
You should send him a tweet through a sock Dreger account where you recommend he shear it.

Torts is all about tough love, he'll understand. Nobody wants to look ridiculous if they don't have to.

*admires forehead swastika in mirror*
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by ODB »

Strangelove wrote:
The only thing that worries me about Torts is that he sometimes sports a goatee.... :look:
Oh fuck, you're right!

Well ask anyone that's dealt with him for any length of time and I'm sure they'll tell you he's a douche bag so?

DB's Are Us?
BTW, NOT A FLAME ... JUST AN OBSERVATION ... :P
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Strangelove »

Image

Image
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Strangelove »

ODB wrote: DB's Are Us?
Yeah, let's run with that. :drink:

We could get the whole team to grow goatees as a way of saying "Fuck you world!"

Thank God we got rid of that giggling coddler though amirite?

Torts is like his polar opposite.

As an aside, I wonder if this increases our chances of signing my man Clowe. :thumbs:

EDIT: The words of Rangers coach John Tortorella were hardly veiled, as on his team’s breakup day yesterday he made a strong push to keep unrestricted free agent Ryane Clowe wearing the Blueshirt. “I can’t talk about the contracts, I just think I’d be stepping out of bounds, but as far as Ryane Clowe, he’s the type of player you need in the playoffs,” Tortorella said.
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by ODB »

Strangelove wrote:

We could get the whole team to grow goatees as a way of saying "Fuck you world!"
I see what you're sayin but, I highly doubt the whole team would agree to look like a bunch-o-assholes just to say "Fuck you world!"

A douche bag coach and a couple of soft sisters is really sufficient.
BTW, NOT A FLAME ... JUST AN OBSERVATION ... :P
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Strangelove »

Truth, no one likes to be justifiably called "cuntface".
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Boston Canucker »

Thumbs down. I've watched many, many a Rangers game, really don't see him getting enough out of that talent. My thumbs down is purely hockey related, not his personality...he had the great run with TB in the playoffs in 2004, no doubt. But with NYR basically going out of its way to get him talent, and with the goalie he had, didn't see an elevation of the team's game in the playoffs.

I'll be thrilled to be wrong, but initial vote, negatory, good buddies.
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Rumsfeld »

Torts is like the hockey version of fucking Ralphie from the Sopranos. The good news is that Ralphie was my favourite character and this is going to be hilarious. The bad news is that Ralphie and Torts both have ego issues which prevent them from playing well with others. :lol:

I hope Torts straight up rips the softy Sedin kids a new one. That'll be interesting. I don't think they're going to take too kindly to Tortellini's Dwarf Complex and this hiring makes their re-upping in Vancouver less likely than it was yesterday IMO. Which I'm of course fine with BTW. :mex: :mex:

Luckily the Sedins are also still living in 1999 and think goatees are an acceptable form of facial hair.

I'm actually really looking forward to this. Let's face it, sports are about being entertained, and this greasy little Napolean wop is going to entertain the shit out of us. If Torts thought the NY media was bad wait till he gets a load of these twatflaps! :lol:

The greaseballs who sit behind our bench must be stoked as well.

:drink:
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Eddy Punch Clock »

Gillis on 1040...
2011..... the one that got away.
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Re: Vancouver Canucks hire asshole coach John Tortorella rum

Post by Hockey Widow »

Still no confirmation from MG other than to confirm Torts is in Vancouver. The Canucks have not yet officially hired a coach and won't offer up speculation or confirm rumours Torts has been offered a deal. Will make an announcement when hey have one to make.
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